Have I mentioned yet that I am obsessed with Hamilton?  Like REALLY obsessed.  I’m not sure exactly when I first listened to it, but from the moment I did, it took over my brain.  You know those shirts that say, “my thoughts have been replaced with Hamilton lyrics”? It’s true.  Early on in the pandemic I also started listening to a lot of podcasts and one of them was about ALL things Hamilton which included interviews with EVERYONE from the cast, crew, musicians, directors, etc.  I’m pretty sure there is even a Drunk History episode with Lin Manuel Miranda that snuck it’s way into my life too.  Confession: I based my homeschool curriculum for my 7 year old son around early American history for the sole purpose of being able to interweave the musical into our lessons.  I have now also corrupted my 9 year old daughter with this love / obsession.  She was a late-comer to the craze in this house, but at this point I’m pretty sure she knows more of the lyrics than me, which is no small feat.  

Anyway, all this to say, I have listened enough times to have garnered a few life lessons from the show.  Not that Uno isn’t a wise and trusted teacher (Uno the Zen Master), but I believe you can have more than one guide.  You should take life lessons wherever they come from as long as it’s a trusted source.  So, without further ado, I give you the 10 Life Commandments from Hamilton:

  1. Un — Live your life with purpose and intention–and be kind in the process.  SO many lyrics from different songs in the musical point this out.  History has its eyes on you….what is your legacy?  Who will tell YOUR story?  My daughter once asked me why Burr is the narrator and that aspect hadn’t really ever dawned on me in my YEARS of Hamilton love before she joined me in the obsession.  Burr is the narrator because he lives and Hamilton dies.  He gets to tell the story from HIS perspective.  You don’t get to tell your own story when you’re gone, so live your life in a way that you would be proud of when other people speak of you.  Be kind.  Be helpful.  Do good things, no matter how small they may seem.  You never know how large an impact your words and actions may have on others.  
  1. Deux — Take the time to cultivate friendships.  Hamilton establishes his crew early on (Lafayette, Mulligan, Laurens) and they ALWAYS have his back.  In The Ten Duel Commandments, the second rule says to grab a friend (when you are trying to work out a conflict with someone else).  Hamilton is Washington’s Right Hand Man, and the other characters lament this strong bond in Washington on Your Side.  The strength of these friendships allows Hamilton to rise.  He could not have accomplished all that he did without their help and support. You may think that you can do it all on your own, but there is definitely strength in numbers, and someday, you may just need a little help. A little support. It takes a village. 
  1. Trois — Work hard for what you believe in to create change.  Be the change.  Consider this: if you stand for nothing, what will you fall for? Hamilton writes and he writes like he’s running out of time because he doesn’t want to waste a single moment, a single opportunity.  He does not want to throw away his shot (My Shot), and the man is Non-Stop.  He believes whole-heartedly in the work that he is doing and must do everything in his power to convince others and to help create and build the nation.  He has strong beliefs and is willing to do the work to make his goals a reality.  He is passionate.  Whatever you are passionate about, give it 110% of your effort.  Believe in yourself and your vision.  Don’t just dream about what could be.  Make it happen.  Work!
  1. Quatre — Self care is key: it’s okay to rest and take care of YOU! All that hard work is exhausting, and you should absolutely Take a Break when you need to.  Refuel and rest, then come back refreshed and revitalized.  I love the analogy of the airplane oxygen masks.  They instruct you to put yours on first for a reason.  You simply can’t help others if you are struggling (to breathe).  Take care of yourself so you have the energy to give to others.  Hamilton isn’t great at this, even though his wife and her sister implore him to take a break.   
  1. Cinq — You are enough.  Be content with where you are and what you have.  Hamilton’s wife (Eliza) sings That Would Be Enough in a failed attempt to get him to slow down, and be happy with what he has accomplished.  She wants him to stay home and be present with her and their family.  Her sister (Angelica) sings Satisfied and it’s almost a warning, a bit of foreshadowing, that no matter what he does, no matter how hard he works, he will never be content.  He will never feel like his work is done.  This goes along with the fourth bit of advice to rest.  You should also take the time to pause and reflect.  To see what you HAVE accomplished.  Find contentment.  Be present with those you love.  Be grateful.   Look around at how lucky you are to be alive right now.
  1. Six — Conflict is inevitable.  Be kind when attempting to resolve disagreements.  The Ten Duel Commandments are really a set of rules for how to play fair and still be a gentleman (even when you might actually kill someone over a tiny disagreement??).  The rules suggest several ways to try and come to an agreement before the actual duel happens.  You should also be prepared (have a doctor nearby) in case someone gets hurt.  Each party should have a friend there to help negotiate, perhaps be a bit more impartial in trying to resolve the conflict.  In the second duel of the musical, Hamilton encourages his son to aim his pistol at the sky.  I think this is all great advice for ANY conflict.  Fight fairly.  Don’t say things (shoot off at the mouth) that are hurtful and that you will likely regret later.  “Disarm” yourself and try to calmly and rationally state your case, have an open-minded discussion.  If you really can’t come to some sort of an agreement, invite a third party in to help mediate (therapist, mutual friend, etc.).  At the end of the song they count to 10 as they walk away from each other (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, number 10 paces, fire!), and perhaps that’s where we should leave this analogy.  Agree to disagree.  Count to ten.  Walk away.  Aiming your pistol at the sky isn’t conceding that your opponent is correct.  It’s simply being the bigger person.  Avoiding more serious damage and perhaps finding a way to just let it go.  
  1. Sept — Temptation is out there.  Choose wisely what you consume, whether that be food, media, or any other potential vice.  Hamilton does not exhibit restraint in Say No to This and it changes the course of his life.  So much of the musical after this point revolves around the consequences of his actions in this one song.  The same is true for our own lives.  We have choices and we are free to make them.  However every action has an equal (and) opposite reaction.  Your decisions are not made in a vacuum.  Make conscious and intentional choices and consider the potential consequences before you act.
  1. Huit — Forgiveness.  Can you imagine?  Eliza’s emotional pain is a direct result of Hamilton’s (poor) choices. He cheats on her AND in an effort to clear his name (politically) he publishes a pamphlet acknowledging the adultery to prove he didn’t embezzle government money.  Burn.  And that’s exactly what Eliza does to the love letters from him that she once treasured.  She is a woman scorned.  But she doesn’t leave him.  Then, Hamilton is partially to blame for the death of their son.  Again, Hamilton is not a great decision maker, and he not only guides his son in proper duel procedures, but he also gives him a gun.  Eliza is crushed.  The two move out of the city and she spends a long time being sad and hurt and angry.  But in the end, she forgives him.  For all of it.  I know this one is hard, but ultimately it’s not about absolving the other person’s mistakes.  It’s about coming to peace with what has happened, and freeing YOUR OWN MIND from the upheaval that it has caused. It’s Quiet Uptown is perhaps a euphemism for the sense of calm in your own headspace, the freedom you might feel, if you are able to forgive.
  1. Neuf — Balance!  Passion vs Patience: Are you Hamilton or Burr?  This one comes up a lot in our house.  Hamilton is impatient, makes some rash (and not inconsequential) decisions, but he is highly motivated and works 24/7 for the ideals he believes in.  He is passionate.  Burr for the majority of his time on stage is willing to wait for it.  He is patient; he listens and watches and waits to see what will happen before choosing sides and taking action.  He is slow, steady and methodical.  It’s like the tortoise and the hare, and we all know which one came out on top. My husband is definitely more Hamilton and I am one hundred percent more like Burr.  Truthfully they both have redeeming qualities, and my husband and I aren’t embattled in a 25 year rivalry, so in our marriage (thankfully) we help to balance each other out.

Why is there no number 10???  Dix, number 10 is yours to create, your call to action.  The shot has been fired. What are you going to do / make / create / change.  How are you going to live your life?